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Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Remember I don't have kids...

I feel as though I need to remind people I am not pregnant nor do I have kids. I really have a misconception about parenting but in the past week since meeting "knowledge" on the bus I think I have a bad case of the babies and not in the maternal kind of way.

First off, my landlady has been shoving ( literally) eggs into my refrigerator door like I am magically going to get maternal with eggs and make breakfast. To say the least these eggs will not be turned into anything more than compost.

Next, I have met a very nice man with children not to say I am not attracted but EVERY time we arrange to meet there is a mysterious "ballet" lesson or some odd school play. Do those things happen on Tuesday nights? I have my doubts.

Thirdly, everyone under the sun has a case of the babies. People planning a party for ...pregnant. People I am making reservations for ...pregnant. People on the bus are pregnant including one 18 year old this morning to which I nearly wanted to slap upside the head and tell her " well this is REALITY! " because she is so upset she has to count her pennies and find another roommate because apparently the first one got her knocked up.

While I do have some patience for stupid people who procreate I think I have a lot of insight considering I am reading Suri's Burn Book because really if you are a baby of someone who is famous you should have a more decent sense of style ( side eye to you Suri ).



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